Okay, here goes.
This is the first boyfriend I've ever had. We dated for a year, he dumped me, I was devastated - and I learned to not be so emotional/immature in my next relationship from him:
A year later, I dated this one. After about 10 months, he got really abusive. You don't even want to hear it. I broke up with him after my parents found out what he was doing to me and threatened to kill him if he showed up at my house again. He was an ass, but I still cried cause I didn't want to hurt him - go figure:
After that came this one - Ferdinand. Straight from Germany! We dated for a year and a half.. then I broke up with him because we began fighting every day and I couldn't take it anymore. About two weeks later, I went to his house to talk things out - and he's sleeping with his best friend's girlfriend when I get there. Then I found out that he was only faithful to me the first month of our relationship - and started cheating right after. Damn Germans!
And here is my fiancee, who has taught me more things about life than anybody else I know. He is my heart, my soul - and everything I could ever have dreamed of in a partner. He's... perfect:
A new Lemieux-McCarty fight, as seen by internet forum posters.
Lemieux cheapshots a player with his walker, drawing the ire of D-Mac, who hobbles over. They draw their canes, salute, and cross them, then proceed to repeatedly whack eachother over the heads while hanging onto the bench with their other hands for balance. D-Mac then hits Lemieux's hip, which gives out, Lemieux feebly falls to the ground, crumpling as D-Mac continues to land barely noticeable Yoda-esque cane strikes. Lemieux's age begins catching up to him, crying "what a world, what a world..!" as he melts into a puddle of goo.