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Nick Lidstrom and Chuck Norris


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#1 mwagner468

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 10:07 PM

I though since Nick is pretty much the perfect human, we could start a Chuck Norris type of thread about #5.

I will start. Nick Lidstrom has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead. He is just afraid to move.

#2 WingZNut13

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 10:11 PM

This is old but modified....

Chuck Norris wears Nick Lidstrom pajamas at night.
What kind of color is red? Red is a warning. A declaration. A color that says I'm ready to do what it takes. Red is focused and Driven because red doesn't like second place. So what Kind of color is red? Our kind" - The Red Wing Army

#3 gowings00

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 10:12 PM

Nick Lidstrom once visited the Virgin Islands.......now they're just call "the islands".

#4 AceInTheSleeve

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 10:30 PM

If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Nick Lidstrom.

#5 drw138

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 10:55 PM

nick lidstrom can unscramble an egg!
we're back

#6 Kage5691

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 11:14 PM

Nick Lidstrom doesn't sleep. He waits..

#7 13dangledangle

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 11:26 PM

When Zdeno Chara and Shea Weber go to sleep they curl up in Nick Lidstroms nutsack.
....Ladies and Gentlemen Jimmy "F%$*ing" Howard.

#8 evilzyme

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 11:27 PM

When Zdeno Chara and Shea Weber go to sleep they curl up in Nick Lidstroms nutsack.


What the f***?

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#9 Autika

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 11:33 PM

What the f***?


DON'T QUESTION NICK LIDSTROM.

#10 13dangledangle

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Posted 24 January 2012 - 11:41 PM

DON'T QUESTION NICK LIDSTROM.



That sir is the correct answer. A man once tried to correct Nick Lidstrom but shortly thereafter the man hurled himself in front of an oncoming bus as this was a much eaiser task then actually facing Nick Lidstrom.
....Ladies and Gentlemen Jimmy "F%$*ing" Howard.

#11 Red Wings Addict

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 12:52 AM


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#12 Konnan511

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 12:56 AM

Bears. Beets. Nick Lidstrom.
The Best Of BC
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#13 casey holmstrom

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 01:14 AM

Nick Lidstrom doesn't support abolishing the separation between church and state. Norris does. Don't shame Nick and compare the two.


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#14 8 Legged RedWing

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 01:21 AM

Nick Lidstrom doesn't have any hair on his balls... why? Because hair doesn't grow on steel.

#15 egroen

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 01:33 AM

It's been mentioned the only two playoff games Lidstrom has missed was due to a spear to the testicles by Sharp, but what gets forgotten is how Sharp's stick shattered into a million pieces and he has never fathered a child since coming into contact with Lidstrom's balls.
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#16 Red Wings Addict

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 01:36 AM

It's been mentioned the only two playoff games Lidstrom has missed was due to a spear to the testicles by Sharp, but what gets forgotten is how Sharp's stick shattered into a million pieces and he has never fathered a child since coming into contact with Lidstrom's balls.


In all seriousness, does Nick still have two balls or did he have to have that one removed?

#17 Nev

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 01:49 AM

Nick Lidstrom doesn't do push-ups, he pushes the Earth down.










And he still has both testicles.
"If I can be totally honest, it's not a lot of guys you get impressed by. Actually, it's no one else but him. From the bench, to see what move he makes -- you're like, 'I wish I could do that.' Sometimes you sit on the bench and just think, 'wow,' and you look over to the other bench and they sit there and shake their heads, too. He has great, great skills. I'm probably not going to play with another player who has the kind of skills he has." Mikael Samuelsson on Pavel Datsyuk

#18 redwingfan19

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 02:22 AM

Nick Lidstrom created Viagra when he took a Tylenol and dipped it in his sweat.
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#19 WingZNut13

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 02:33 AM

Nick Lidstrom sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
What kind of color is red? Red is a warning. A declaration. A color that says I'm ready to do what it takes. Red is focused and Driven because red doesn't like second place. So what Kind of color is red? Our kind" - The Red Wing Army

#20 lookalive07

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Posted 25 January 2012 - 02:36 AM

When Nick Lidstrom takes a shower, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Nick Lidstrom.

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