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12/17 GDT: Ducks 5 @ Red Wings 2

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I have no skill with graphics but here is an actual, real, genuine, made-up news article:

Detroit (LP)-- Due to a series of injuries, accidents, and incidents, the Red Wings find themselves with only six players for tonight's game against the Ducks of Anaheim. In addition to the players out with injuries (Helm-back, Zetterberg-back, Mrazek-backup, DeKeyeser-shoulder, Samuelsson-face, Bertuzzi-teeth replacement, Abdelkader-didn't see the car this time, Ericsson-new baby, Alfredsson-vasectomy [and this time it'll work,RIGHT BIBI!], Weiss-shoulder or whatever, Datsyuk-back from having to shoulder the team, Howard-knee) several players have encountered freak incidents that will cause them to miss tonight's game.

Daniel Cleary is out after getting lost returning from the dentist. He called Head Coach Mike Babcock earlier this morning assuring him that he would be there for the morning skate. "It's easy." He said. "I just go to the same street as the captain's jersey number, and then turn at the street with my jersey number. I've been doing it for years."

Brenden Smith and Reiley Sheahan did not report for practice although a bail-bondsman is quoted as saying that they are game-time decisions.

Jurco, Nyquist, Tatar, and Lashoff are grounded after sneaking out of the house past their curfew. Their mommies said that they knew the consequences and maybe now they'll think twice about running about on a game night.

Several other team members were reportedly rocking back and forth in their locker stalls, unable to bring themselves to dress.

Tonight's line-up consists of

Miller-Andersson-Eaves

Kronwall-Quincey

Gustavsson

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That may be the worst lineup ive EVER seen for the wings..

Tomas Jurco-Pavel Datsyuk-Daniel Alfredsson

Drew Miller-Joakim Andersson-Tomas Tatar

Daniel Cleary-Luke Glendening-Patrick Eaves

Todd Bertuzzi-Riley Sheahan-Mikael Samuelsson

Alfredsson just doesn't play well with datsyuk and the rest of the lines just speak for themselves. Going against one of the top teams, and a very physical one...tonight will be bad

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Son of a motherless goat....when will the madness end?

That may be the worst lineup ive EVER seen for the wings..

Tomas Jurco-Pavel Datsyuk-Daniel Alfredsson

Drew Miller-Joakim Andersson-Tomas Tatar

Daniel Cleary-Luke Glendening-Patrick Eaves

Todd Bertuzzi-Riley Sheahan-Mikael Samuelsson

Alfredsson just doesn't play well with datsyuk and the rest of the lines just speak for themselves. Going against one of the top teams, and a very physical one...tonight will be bad

Weren't we saying the same thing a few weeks ago with Z&D out?

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I have no skill with graphics but here is an actual, real, genuine, made-up news article:

Detroit (LP)-- Due to a series of injuries, accidents, and incidents, the Red Wings find themselves with only six players for tonight's game against the Ducks of Anaheim. In addition to the players out with injuries (Helm-back, Zetterberg-back, Mrazek-backup, DeKeyeser-shoulder, Samuelsson-face, Bertuzzi-teeth replacement, Abdelkader-didn't see the car this time, Ericsson-new baby, Alfredsson-vasectomy [and this time it'll work,RIGHT BIBI!], Weiss-shoulder or whatever, Datsyuk-back from having to shoulder the team, Howard-knee) several players have encountered freak incidents that will cause them to miss tonight's game.

Daniel Cleary is out after getting lost returning from the dentist. He called Head Coach Mike Babcock earlier this morning assuring him that he would be there for the morning skate. "It's easy." He said. "I just go to the same street as the captain's jersey number, and then turn at the street with my jersey number. I've been doing it for years."

Brenden Smith and Reiley Sheahan did not report for practice although a bail-bondsman is quoted as saying that they are game-time decisions.

Jurco, Nyquist, Tatar, and Lashoff are grounded after sneaking out of the house past their curfew. Their mommies said that they knew the consequences and maybe now they'll think twice about running about on a game night.

Several other team members were reportedly rocking back and forth in their locker stalls, unable to bring themselves to dress.

Tonight's line-up consists of

Miller-Andersson-Eaves

Kronwall-Quincey

Gustavsson

Strangely if this were a late night beer league game it would be a perfectly good excuse as to why no players show up lol

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Dan Cleary getting power play time is INFURIATING.

The second half of every power play is just worthless, I won't watch. He either loses a board battle and the puck is cleared or we win a draw and he races to the front of the net and blocks every shot a Red Wings sends toward the go, then flails at the puck when it's between his feet.

The power play has been atrocious, I believe mainly because we're only having decent players out there for HALF THE TIME (and Alfie does NOT belong on the point, also a terrible decision).

How many minutes this season has Cleary spent on the powerplay???

His point total = ZERO.

Zero points, yet he's on the second unit every game. It's inexcusable.

Do we blame this on Babcock or Tom Renney?

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It's time to make some major personnel changes when there's no other choice but to have Cleary, Sammy, AND Bertuzzi all in the same lineup. At this rate, everyone that's injured right now, has history of battling with injuries. I would put them all on LTIR, give them adequate time (2 months) to rest, get over the menstrual cycle (Franzen), and get into game shape. Allowing all of our prospects to be called up (rules?) and allow them the right to actually play in the league that drafted them. They were drafted to be NHL players, correct? Maybe I'm delusional, but you can't produce NHL talent at the AHL level? (Brendan Smith) That's like planting seeds for a tomato plant, expecting bell peppers. It's seems like obvious mismanagement, at the multi-million dollar level. The payroll of the injured is most likely higher than the payroll of the dressed(verification?) They just don't match up with the rest of the league. We have skill guys to support our skill guys, and defensive forwards to support the skill guys that are supporting the skill guys. The rest of the league is filled with skill guys, fighters, grinders, playmakers, defensive guys, power guys, speed guys. The Red Wings perfectly represent the city that houses them; old outdated philosophy; rebuilding on the fly but not really changing much thus not really rebuilding; great potential but lacking great action; medium to high risk, medium to low reward. Babcock has the hardest job of them all. A Canadian with the goal to motivate, give direction, fill potential, and create a respectful atmosphere to a group of Europeans, to please the American market.

Anyways, back to the topic.... I don't really expect more than 20 shots on net, maybe 1 or 2 fluke goals. Anaheim always plays Detroit the same way. It's up to them how far they want this season to go. Heart, determination, and a sense of urgency would sure make this season a little bit easier to watch.

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Glendening, Jurco, Andersson, and Sheahan all get hat tricks, the Red Griffs blow up offensively and put up 97 shots and win 17-0. Datsyuk breaks the NHL record for assists and points with 1 goal 14 assists and 15 points. Cleary and Sammy combine for 1 assist. Hiller turns his crease yellow and Getzlaf cries.

Here we go good vibes here we go!

GO RED WINGS!!!!!

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It's time to make some major personnel changes when there's no other choice but to have Cleary, Sammy, AND Bertuzzi all in the same lineup. At this rate, everyone that's injured right now, has history of battling with injuries. I would put them all on LTIR, give them adequate time (2 months) to rest, get over the menstrual cycle (Franzen), and get into game shape. Allowing all of our prospects to be called up (rules?) and allow them the right to actually play in the league that drafted them. They were drafted to be NHL players, correct? Maybe I'm delusional, but you can't produce NHL talent at the AHL level? (Brendan Smith) That's like planting seeds for a tomato plant, expecting bell peppers. It's seems like obvious mismanagement, at the multi-million dollar level. The payroll of the injured is most likely higher than the payroll of the dressed(verification?) They just don't match up with the rest of the league. We have skill guys to support our skill guys, and defensive forwards to support the skill guys that are supporting the skill guys. The rest of the league is filled with skill guys, fighters, grinders, playmakers, defensive guys, power guys, speed guys. The Red Wings perfectly represent the city that houses them; old outdated philosophy; rebuilding on the fly but not really changing much thus not really rebuilding; great potential but lacking great action; medium to high risk, medium to low reward. Babcock has the hardest job of them all. A Canadian with the goal to motivate, give direction, fill potential, and create a respectful atmosphere to a group of Europeans, to please the American market.

Anyways, back to the topic.... I don't really expect more than 20 shots on net, maybe 1 or 2 fluke goals. Anaheim always plays Detroit the same way. It's up to them how far they want this season to go. Heart, determination, and a sense of urgency would sure make this season a little bit easier to watch.

I don't believe you're delusional, but if you look at Edmonton... there's not much success playing a team of young guys. I believe only the Elite players can come to the NHL right away, so I have no issue with 2-3 years in the AHL, although here it's more like 5-6 (typically).

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Smith in jail because, in reference to Lucic taking the high road, Smith said he would have beat that guys ass?

Only Sheahan is in jail. Smith can't come to the practice because he can't find his driver's license, which is missing from his gym bag, but somehow ended up in Sheahan's possession. Again.

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Only Sheahan is in jail. Smith can't come to the practice because he can't find his driver's license, which is missing from his gym bag, but somehow ended up in Sheahan's possession. Again.

You've been on a roll today! I hope you will be gracing us with your presence here in the GDT, otherwise I don't know if I will be able to hack it.

Yes, things are s***ty right now. Yes, we will probably lose. But LGW anyway!

Wings win 8-2 with goals from Mantha (6), Kronner, and Tyler Bertuzzi. Book it!

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You've been on a roll today! I hope you will be gracing us with your presence here in the GDT, otherwise I don't know if I will be able to hack it.

Yes, things are s***ty right now. Yes, we will probably lose. But LGW anyway!

Wings win 8-2 with goals from Mantha (6), Kronner, and Tyler Bertuzzi. Book it!

I don't usually make it here during games since it's hard to read, post, and watch all at the same time on one computer.

Plus when we lose, I prefer to be alone in my despair.

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