Electrophile

Seeing as I'm a woman, that would be no.

Steve Yzerman.

Hey, impotent men can still father children. You just take some Cialis and get to work.

I love how in spite of how horrible and awful we are, we've all retained our senses of humor. To help us through the dark times, you see.

To think, just a few days ago someone was saying that you couldn't find intellectually stimulating conversation here. How deceived they were.

Ah yes, the ol' "he's phoning it in" chestnut. Hilarity.

Which you can blame on the end of the steel industry in this country. When the mills shut down, people left. Gary, Indiana used to be another bustling metropolis, but it befell the same fate.

It doubles as as second purse.

Nope. "Happy New Year" and "Kiss".

Well of course they are. They should just host the Stanley Cup Finals every year too. And the All-Star Game. And the Winter Classic. And anything else that has anything remotely to do with the NHL.

Hey, whycome I got negged for making fun of Gary Bettman? Touchy lot here, apparently.

She's smart, pretty, and has kick-ass taste in music. Most offspring of wealthy and famous people turn out to be complete wastes of space - good to see she's an exception to the rule.

Gary Bettman is stepping down as commissioner, and announcing that he and Sidney Crosby are getting married and moving upstate to run a small bed-and-breakfast in the Adirondacks. The league will henceforth be run by the Puck-O-Tron 3000. Think R2D2, but way smarter about hockey. Which would be a step above Bettman anyway.

FIRE SALE!! FIRE SALE!!

What's worse - he could go blind.

No one here thinks he's the reincarnation of Terry Sawchuk, nor did anyone think so when we re-signed him. We needed a back-up goalie for Howard after Ozzie retired, and we got one.

He's a Red Wing, thus I want him to do well. I don't care if he's the worst player on the team - when he's on the ice, I want him to succeed. Most people here know I carry no love for Todd Bertuzzi, but that doesn't mean I hope he sucks. If he sucks, our team suffers. Same with Conklin. He's not the best goalie on the team this season, he's not even the best goalie our team has ever had in its history, but when he goes between the pipes, I hope he turns into the reincarnation of Terry Sawchuk.

Yes, how dare Jimmy Howard spend a couple days with his wife, who just pushed something the size of a watermelon out of a hole the size of a lemon, and thus is probably still in some discomfort, on top of getting used to having a newborn in the house. The cad. The scoundrel. The bastard. Thank God you're here to help us see the way clearly.

Who cares what people on another forum say about this place? I sure as hell don't. I'm glad you do, though.

It must suck to be happy the team lost so you can say "I told you so" about one player. Geez Louise. Imagine if we'd won and Conks made 65 saves - we'd never hear from this guy again.

We lost. It sucks. There's more games to play and more games to win. We'll be fine.

It'd be real great if the team that won its first five games shows up for the last 20 minutes of this one. Come again?

The Wings look like crap tonight. Damn, dudes. Wake up.

The link works fine, I just tried it. Edit: Now it's out again. Who knows....just follow the game here.

You're joking, right? I was responding to Mason getting put back into the game after supposedly being pulled because of an injury. Then I compared that to another sport and said that it can't happen in baseball - once you're pulled, you don't get put back in the game, even if turns out nothing was really wrong. Didn't think I was speaking Greek, there.