55fan

Joey chips a nail, so Ozzie is put in as backup since you don't use your groin when charting face-offs. At the end of the first, the score is 0-0. JHo has faced no shots, so he goes out for a beer during intermission. Finding a nice microbrewery that produces a hearty, yet lilting ale, he loses track of time and fails to return to the game. With 15 seconds left in the second period, Horcroff rings one off the post, and everyone notices that the Wings have had an empty net for the entire period. Ozzie drops his chart, grabs his helmet, but due to the groin injury, he is too late to get to the net, the Oilers get the rebound, and score. Ozzie plays the third. Final score: Wings 3, Oilers 1. Ozzie with the hat trick. LGW complains that he should have had the "soft" goal, and that his scoring is "streaky".

Defensive coach. I just got a warm fuzzy feeling in my most innermost being, not to mention other areas. The only suggestion I would make would be adding Parros as a goalie. His 'stache can be his backup.

Not to mention "LUCKY!!!" Failure would put you in the running for the Matt Millen Award for Endless Ways to *uck Up a Team.

Yea. I support some through my church. I know where the money's going and that it isn't being wasted by greedy executives or government ineptitude or sent to something I don't agree with. I also ring bells for the SA every Christmas. The person below me has seen an alligator/crocodile running around wild. Edit for clarification: The word "wild" refers to the animal, not you.

Hatred? Not a chance! This is fun. If we hated them, we'd skip them.

Not this old hag. The person below me likes hot dogs.

Too tired to fish. I'll cut bait for this time. Selke or Richard? (trophies)

The Force is strong with this one.

Your lines make me snort.

Let them have them. Then you can text them and they'll actually pay attention for the brief second that it takes to read the text. On a more serious note, it's good to have them. I heard of a girl- much older than yours, but the lesson is the same- who got kidnapped and she had her cell phone. They threw her in the trunk of the car and she was able to call for help. Paper towels or cloth?

Lovely. The person below me has tried to lick off someone's tattoo to see if it was real.

I usually go with the red delicious. Which is worse: Falling asleep on your feet or lying awake in bed?

Keep the 'stache and explain Movember to her. If she is any sort of a good woman at all, she will be thrilled by your social awareness. If she doesn't like you with a mustache, then ditch her. You may want to grow one permanently some day. You just never know. I really need to get rid of mine too. Shave, pluck, or wax? That is the question...

I don't know when I became a good cook, but considering that my ethnic heritage involves sauerkraut, corned beef, tripe, and haggis, I think the question is how I became a good cook. The person below me can whip out a meal for a crowd.

I guess I would go with the bread since I hate the pie to the point that I can't even choke it down to be polite. Watch the Lions on Thanksgiving or not?

Interesting. Firefighter, indeed. I guess if David Lee Roth can be an EMT...

I don't play video games, but that sort of music brings out the desire to slam things into boards and knock people's teeth out in me as well.

Kind of, but I can't stand warm weather either. At least if it's cold we can put on another layer. The person below me can't seem to eat pasta without getting some on their shirt.

Um, that's a tux? Or he's using Tucks now that he's with the Ducks? Or he's using Tucks 'cuz he didn't have the luck to duck a ducky *uck from a yucky puck schmuck who makes me upchuck on that team that sucks worse that the Canucks with no Happy Clucks? Lilja just does not belong in that paragraph at all.

Yes, I did. Went to the doctor. Found out I have tendonitis in my dominant wrist. Went to the polls and had to fill in all of those stupid ovals for people running unopposed. The person below me is glad that elections aren't like college football games with people running around with their colours painted on them screaming taunts at the other party's voters... On the other hand, there could be some cool tailgating...

Elope. Too broke to pay for it, and too old to have the energy to carry it out and still get boinked on my honeymoon. Hide treasure in your sock drawer on under your mattress?

I was waiting to hear what Cheveldae, Gilchrist, and Klima were doing now.

I'd rather we didn't change at all, but I couldn't really care less which one we choose. For all I care, we can change time by 1/2 hour and split the difference. The person below me has eaten fish in the last week.

Rotten veggies. For any campaign. Give each candidate one column of newsprint per week to express his views and that's it. No phone calls. No door hangers. No mailbox stuffers. Take all of the wasted money and give it to charity. Take all of the wasted paper out of the landfill. Take all of the wasted volunteer hours and put them to work actually helping people. Democrat or Republican?

Not at the moment. I'm kind of sick of it. The person below me has a lot of work to do today but doesn't know where to start.