kipwinger

I stopped reading part way through. I'm sure you did a really good job of creatively hanging on on my every word though.

Be smarter and better looking that pretty much everyone else.

You have no idea. I sit around seething all day everyday because of the interactions I have on LGW. You guys are all that important to me. Just kidding. When I'm not here trolling you guys I'm banging my super hot girlfriend and/or making a bunch of money.

Fitting that I'd be in the lead to "sacrifice to the hockey gods for the 1st overall pick" since most of you tards would use it on Lafreniere and set the rebuild back, thus vindicating me.

I'd deflect all the time too if I routinely put out hot takes like this.... https://www.wingingitinmotown.com/2016/2/16/11007274/why-brendan-smith-is-really-that-damn-good

There's this whole legion of snarky hockey personalities that I find distasteful in their passive aggression. Him, Dimitri Filipovic, Pryshanth Iyer, the guys at wingingitinmotown. It's not that they don't know hockey, they're more knowledgable than most fans I suppose. It's that they basically insert internet culture into sports, which is kinda gross to me. Jay and Dan are genuinely funny guys, but their humor resides in their creativity and silliness. Guys like Wysh substitute cynicism and condescension for humor. He's basically David Spade...whom I can't stand.

Cholowski can actually score. So probably not. Brendan Smith was an "offensive" defenseman who never put up any offense. God he sucked. On any other team Cholowski would have played on the third pair last year, been sheltered, and eased into his role and nobody would be saying anything about him. Sure he's got things to work on. All young defensemen do. But on this team he's competing with about 47 veteran defenseman, all of whom make a ton of money, none of whom you want sitting on the bench for 3 or 4 million dollars a year. So Cholowski sat. No biggie. Also, a new coach will help. Blash, like Babs before him, is soooooooooooooooo risk averse. I've heard many, many, many other coaches talk about how they don't mind if players make mistakes as long as they're A) trying to make a play, and B) don't keep making the same mistakes. If you're a young player for the Wings you just don't have that same degree of leeway.

I actually get it. I mean, anytime something is too omnipresent it generally puts me off. And the Wings were that through the 90s and 2000s. Like, I still have never seen the movie Avatar because about 10,000 people all told me to watch it about 30 seconds after it came out. I don't like Wyshynski, he's a s***head. But he's not a "reporter". He's a content producer. He's more like the guys and gals at Barstool than he is like Bob McKenzie. So the fact that he plays a character isn't really a thing for me. It's that he plays THIS particular character. Listening to a 40+ year old speak like 20 year olds on the internet makes me puke. Everytime Greg says something is "fire" or "on fleek" or that it gives him "all the feels" I'm immediately reminded of why he sucks. That said, the Yahoo NHL Obituaries idea of his was solid gold. So he's had a few wins in his day.

100% yes, but with all the same caveats that everyone else has. Ottawa doesn't do it. Trading back one spot almost never happens for obvious reasons. Usually you have to move back a couple spots so that one team can leapfrog two others. That said, I'd still entertain this trade if we had the 2nd pick and wanted to trade it to whomever had the 4th plus their 2nd rounder.

I definitely have made improper jokes. But I don't STILL make improper jokes. And as I've already said, at least in this one respect, I AM a better person than you.

Ohhhh s***, I didn't realize that Jimmy Howard was cut by the Red Wings because he's overweight. That changes everything. Clearly Jimmy got heavy, lost his job, and you're just commenting on that turn of events. See, all this time I thought Jimmy Howard had ALWAYS been a heavier guy by NHL standards and yet he's had a nice long 13 year career (including being named to the all-rookie team and a two time all-star). Thus proving your tepid, post hoc, "he's heavy therefore he's no good" theory even more invalid than every other thing you've said. About how many posts of you looking stupid and/or wrong is it going to take before you wake up to the fact that indefensible positions (like making fun of overweight people) are indefensible? See, the problem for guys like you is that in addition to being weak, unethical, cowards, you're also stupid. And guys like me aren't.

Larkin's corsi/for is 50.2%. That's ranks 288th in the league amongst players who played at least 30 games this year. Should I check his fenwick too or do you just wanna acknowledge that his "advanced stats" aren't as "outstanding" as you probably think?

Yes indeed, what an ego maniac I am for not thinking it's funny to make a joke of overweight people. And you're right, it's just me being an "internet warrior". In real like I totally make fun of overweight people behind their backs and then triple down on doing so via the anonymity of the internet. Yep, that's definitely me.

First of all, it's laughable to think that you're accusing me of "shaming" anyone when this entire conversation is built on the premise that I don't like when dingbats like you shame overweight people. And THAT fact does, at least in this one respect, make me morally superior to you. Secondly, you've made it clear that behind closed doors, protected by the anonymity of the your home and/or avatar, you're unapologetically unethical. I haven't missed that point. I am, however, going to continue to point out that you're a sh*tbag for it. Because in addition to the fact that you think "being overweight is funny...durrr" you also are a weasel for hiding it. So continue to pat yourself on the back buddy. You truly are exemplary.

And you kinda also said "get rid of the fatties" by "shaming then". So you were kinda, sorta, being a d*ck too. And that's the part I'm responding to. Again, if you wanted to have a frank discussion about whether Jimmy's fitness is impacting his play you'd have kinda left that other part out wouldn't you? Why not just own the fact that you're the type of dude who thinking clowning overweight people on the internet anonymously is pretty funny? At least you wouldn't be speaking out of both sides of your mouth.

You're right. Context does matter. Some people think it's okay to do unethical things in private, just not in public, and that's somehow better. It also has the added bonus of allowing them to hide the fact that they're being a sh*tty person. The context totally matters in this case because as long as nobody SEES you being bad then you can pretend you aren't. Imagine if overweight people (for instance) could hide their imperfections. I know. And then that conversation evolved into people talking about "reviling" fat people and other such things. But YOU started it by emphasized the weight thing, and not the poor hockey thing, when you said something about "shaming fatties". If you'd just said "Jimmy Howard sucks and I think it's because he's not in good shape" we wouldn't be having this conversation. Now you're backtracking to make it seem like this was all about his play and not about you getting in a funny zinger about "fatties". Again, say whatever you want. It's a free country. But every time you say something like that I'll call you on it.

Which advanced stats would those be?

You weren't poking fun at their job. You were poking fun at their weight. What difference does their employer make? Do what you want, it's a free country. I just think clowning overweight people is a p*ssy move that most of you would never do it real life. I'm fine with that. At least I'm a self-righteous asshat who thinks clowning overweight people is generally a bad, not good, thing.

Larkin and Zetterberg are really only similar in that they're both really tenacious. Z was a MUCH better offensive player, stud defensive forward, and his success was largely driven by his attention to detail, relentless two-way effort, and high hockey IQ. Larkin on the other hand, is fast.

I'm the only one calling out his post, and defending the "fatties" here. So it was definitely directed at me, despite how mealy mouthed you're being about it now. And no, none of that qualifies you as a tough guy. It should, however, give you a little perspective. First, because right wing internet douchebags (when they're not finger pointing "snowflakes") would trip over themselves to call you a "cuck" for your marital situation. Secondly, because being a health care professional should generally give you a more nuanced understanding of health, and obesity, and preclude you from back slapping idiots who wanna pick on "fatties". Finally, being a soldier doesn't make me any more of a man than you or anybody else. But it definitely means I'm not some "snowflake" with delicate sensibilities just because I think bullying overweight people is a b*tch move.

Totally agree. You're definitely a huge dick.

It's odd, nobody thought I was a "snowflake" during my tours in Iraq and Afghanistan. What are your tough guy credentials again?

Overplayed your hand on that one. With a little more subtlety you could have strung me along a bit.

I did use Byfuglien yesterday when this all started. Catch up.

Pro athletes don't make money for being in shape. They make money for being good at their sport. And Jimmy has been a good goalie for a long time. Making fun of overweight people is low hanging fruit. It's easy and stupid. And it's disingenuous to pretend like you're being an ******* about it "for their own health". You don't give a s*** about them. They're just an easy scapegoat. It's about as lowbrow as you can get. Which is fine for dumbf*cks, but you should probably hold yourself to a higher standard. Kid 1: My mom fought in Afghanistan! Kid 2: My dad was an ICU nurse during the COVID pandemic! Kid 3: My dad got into an argument on the internet with a guy who was defending fat people! Though I'm sure he'll be a chip off the old block. He'll be punching weaker kids and laughing at ugly girls before you know it.