Heroes of Hockeytown

Haha, no, she means Maggie the monkey, not McGuire the analyst.

Hejduk has only underachieved insofar that he hasn't had a sugar daddy like Forsberg making sure he's living right. 30-35 goals and 70-80 points are what he's shown he's capable of without Peter.

There's not really much anything to know, which does indeed invalidate the existence of any true "experts." TSN has a monkey spinning a wheel, for crying out loud.

I'd say Pavel-Hank-Homer had some pretty decent chemistry when Hank was up and running. Perhaps I imagined it?

"THIS - IS - MOTOWN!" - King Leonidas(?!).

'Tis a fool who makes predictions and disregards the Curse of the Second Seed. One of New Jersey and Anaheim will be leaving these playoffs very disappointed at the end of this year's quarterfinals.

He's officially the head of the Department for Negative Nancys this playoff year.

100 points, 7th in league scoring, why would he retire? Guy's a beast. He is Joe Sakic. Pretty important fella.

Oohhh, and Don VanMassenhoven, they're really picking the cream of the crop for this year.

Well, let's see, we kicked their ass this season.

I assume he means to say: "yes, [we should split up Hank and Pavel because] they always talk during math class"

I've got it! Coaching - Detroit ??? Calgary Goaltending - Detroit ??? Calgary Offense - Detroit ??? Calgary Defense - Detroit ??? Calgary Powerplay - Detroit ??? Calgary Penalty Kill - Detroit ??? Calgary Maybe toss in a few more question marks under coaching and goaltending, and I would also consider removing one for offense; but this is a close approximation.

For the record: The points playoff and bubble teams would have had if there were no shootouts. East 1. Ottawa - 103 2. NJ - 97 3. Atlanta - 90 4. Buffalo - 103 5. Pittsburgh - 95 6. Carolina - 88 7. Toronto - 87 8. NYR - 85 9. Montreal - 84 10. NYI - 84 11. Florida - 84 12. Tampa Bay - 83 West 1. Detroit - 111 2. Anaheim - 106 3. Vancouver - 100 4. San Jose - 105 5. Nashville - 104 6. Dallas - 98 7. Minnesota - 94 8. Calgary - 93 9. Colorado - 90 Some dramatic shifts in the East, while the West is virtually unaltered.

I actually re-arranged my icons into two columns, in between the Stanley Cup and both lists of playoff series. I couldn't have those silly icons obscuring the winged wheel, after all.

The day they introduce a shootout into the playoffs is the day I stop watching hockey. That said, it'll never happen.

That has some rather interesting implications behind it.

I knew you couldn't stay lower-case forever.

No doubt, aflac, that was a solid theme song.

Never you mind!

Fifth in defense points, T-1st in defense +/-, 3rd in league +/-, fourth overall in ice time in the league, arguably the leading candidate for the Norris. Guy's a bum. Fun fact: Datsyuk's seven year deal is the longest in franchise history.

I'd never spoil a good mystery. Follow the clues! What awaits at the end of the tunnel? The Stanley Cup? Secret Nazi gold? Ring Pops(!)? Also: Go go Wings. Wooooo.

Hmmm... given that they're resting some starters, who else would've played if not Mac?

Right. Malkin, Stastny, Staal is how it will likely shake down. Kopitar ought to get some love there, but I have a feeling the Staal hype will motor him to third in voting.

That doesn't mean a lot since Iginla, Langkow, and Friesen are the forwards not dressed tonight. Once the playoffs start he'll probably take a seat.

The waaayyyyaaaiting is the hardest part.