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Please allow me to rewrite this article the way it shouldve been written: SWEDISH MAN RIDING CHILDRENS TOY HIT BY DRIVER IN DOWNTOWN DETROIT Rasmus Andersson - a player for the Calgary Flames of the NHL - was struck by a local driver today while traveling on a ride share scooter in the downtown area. Fox News Detroit caught up with the NHL defenceman for a follow up interview: Q: What happened out there today Rasmus? A: It was a minor accident where I was bumped and knocked off my scooter yeah. I was a little bit shaken up but I was not seriously injured and will be ready for tonights game. Q: Did you know scooters are for baby's? A: Traditionaly they are for children, but ride sharing has made them really popular for adults now too. Q: IDK sounds like you like baby shidt man. A: I don't like baby things, no. Baby-man Rasmus Andersson declined to answer further questions or comment. Typically these communist "ride-share" scooters are found by local teens and dumped into the Detroit river. However, Rasmus was able to find one that had escaped detection. When asked about the incident, the driver of the car involved commented only "Welcome to the motor city betch" and declined to answer further questions. Communist Man-Baby Rasmus Andersson will suit up for tonights game against the Detroit Red Wings at Little Ceasar's Arena, despite our local hero drivers best efforts to destroy the Flames chances by eliminating their best Dman, and protect our fair motor city from the societal poison that is scooter ride sharing. Catch the game tonight at 7pm on Fox Sports Detroit.

When the fuqq did Holland take over LAK? I missed this. I thought Kenny retired after OilLand. I'm suddenly excited to know that tire kicking is alive and well. And Rob Blake? Always thought he might end up in Colorado. Interesting to see him unemployed. You know who survives in LA? Marc Big BIs Bergevin. Now Senior Advisor to Holland. It is with a heavy heart that i must relinquish muh luv of my oilies and my habies and announce that I too join the dream team that is the Kenny/Bergy Kings.