You should feel fortunate that you're so incredibly naive to the horrors of domestic violence. So women can defend themselves, but you're saying the league is trying to punish "their man"? Because, you know, they need his money and that lifestyle he provides. Nothing like contradicting yourself.
Yeah, poor Ray Rice, his life was ruined. You do realize that TMZ probably saved Janay's life, right? At the very least, they prevented a life of abuse for her and probably their daughter. They guy spit in her face and knocked her out and stepped over her like she was a piece of trash. Then he dragged her out of the elevator like she had inconvenienced him. You're upset he was cut? I don't even know what to say. Let me guess, she was probably asking for it, eh?
Did you even read what I wrote?
I am certainly not naive about domestic violence. I am saying that the issues that go along with it are hard enough without the extras added by the media and the general public rushing in, as well as the financial part of it.
Simply having been a victim is hard enough. There is physical and mental healing. There are tough questions about what is best for the family (if there are children involved) and what is best for you.
In the Rice case, she stayed with him. She married him. They have also gone through counseling and he has stopped drinking, which they believe was what caused him to lose it on her. That is her decision and as long as it is working for them, then more power to her. I'm far less concerned about him than about her.
I've known couples that have managed to reconcile after time apart to go through their issues, usually involving alcohol or drugs, but not always. They've gone on to live happy and safe lives.
In most cases, the ending wasn't so idyllic. That is up to the people involved. If they are willing to work on it, let them do so in peace.
These are not easy changes, whether you go and start a new life or whether you stay and work on making it a positive environment. Adding the media attention only makes it that much harder.
That's what I'm trying to say here. I'm not defending the perpetrator; I'm hoping that the victim gets the privacy she deserves.
I've known a lot of people (not just women, but mostly women) who have been in abusive relationships and it was very hard on them to leave, but they did it. I've allowed some in my home when they had no place to stay. I've been the bactine-and-bandaid girl for those who chose to stay.
I've also had a couple of friends who were falsely accused by vindictive exes. It was hard for them as well. Even after they were exonerated, people still believed the worst.
I realize that it is a small percent, but that is why we have the legal system. Charges are brought and either proven or dis-proven. Then judgment is carried out. The judicial system is not perfect by any means, but barring clairvoyance on the part of the jury, it's about as good as it can get.
I'm not saying that abusers shouldn't be punished. They should. I just think that all of the media attention punishes the victim needlessly.
*This statement is my opinion. You may have your own, to which you are entitled, but this thread is about Dom. Perhaps there will be a goalie thread someday in which we can discuss other goalies. This would be lovely as there have been other good ones around Dom's level.
Why on earth are these people (athletes) losing their jobs or getting suspended? They have been accused of crimes. They have been arrested. Charges are filed. Then they go to court.
Why are they getting suspended for SUSPICION of a crime? That's all it is until the person has his day in court. Until it is proven in court, it is an ALLEGED crime with an ALLEGED victim no matter how great the evidence.
If there is a conviction, they must face the consequences- legally, personally, and professionally. If there is jail time, they can be suspended as they will not be able to participate. In that case, their off-ice activities effect their ability to fulfill their contract and suspension makes sense. Otherwise, what they do off the ice (or field, depending on the sport) has nothing to do with their fulfilling their contract to play their game.
Suspending before the facts are in is nothing but public relations posturing and political correct nonsense.
Media attention and suspensions puts the spotlight on a family that is already dealing with issues. Is it really fair to them to aggravate what may very well be a dangerous, or at least tense, situation? It also deals a financial blow to the family. Granted, they probably make a lot of money and can afford suspensions, but in cases such as Rice, is it fair to his wife to remove her income before he goes to court? She married an NFL player with a big salary and now he's unemployed.
As a female, I find it appalling that the league steps into the situation before they have any idea what is actually going on. It sends the message that women can't take care of themselves. Let the family sort things out on their own. Let them get counseling for whatever issues led to the dispute. Let them have their lawyer get them through the legal issues. Leave them alone to sort through the aftermath. Adding the drama of the league stepping in only adds to the problems of the family, not just the player.
I'm not saying the domestic violence should be condoned or that the league should look the other way. I'm just saying that they should stay out of things until the accusations are sorted through and they have facts to deal with. Then they can enforce their rules knowing that they are doing the right thing.
I just feel bad for the wives and children. They have enough to deal with without all the rest of the world stepping in and trying to punish their man in the name of political correctness to assuage the talking heads in the media in addition to the legal and personal issues that they are already facing.