I know it's been years since 2009, but I still want to beat the Penis every time we play them just to get them back for winning the Cup.
Weird thing is that if they'd won in 2008 and we in 2009, I'd consider us even.
My friend's son started college this fall. I was his Sunday school teacher in 4th and 5th grades, so we know each other pretty well. He is one of the most hilarious people I've ever met. I can talk to him for hours and laugh the whole time.
When he left for school, I told him that if he ever needed anything to feel free to call or text or facebook. We'd gotten together to talk on facebook a lot before he started to meet people there. Mostly we just joked around, but some of it was serious. He's rather shy, especially around girls, so we talked about how to meet girls a lot too.
He knows I have a keen interest in all things medical, so he asked me (on facebook) one Saturday about a medical question. His stools were black. I ran through the checklist of things it could be. Nothing. I told him to keep me posted. On Sunday they'd turned green. I asked him a lot of questions about what he'd eaten etc. I was pretty sure at this point that it was just something he ate, but I made sure he knew where his insurance card was (he didn't know) and where the hospital was (he didn't know) and I made him promise that he would go in if he experienced any of a long list of symptoms I gave him.
Monday was Labor Day, so I figured he'd be sleeping in. I texted him around noon to see how he was doing. We had rarely texted before, but I was at work, and I don't have a smartphone (I know, right?) so I kept it short and sweet: "Have you pooped today and what colour was it?"
I didn't get a response. I waited and about an hour later he texted back. He was driving a girl(!) to the store and being a responsible adult, he chose not to text and drive. Instead, he had her read the message to him.
This was many, many years ago. A guy came in wearing a baseball cap, glasses, sandals, one of those half t-shirts, and a g-string. He was followed by another guy who was giggling and carrying a video camera. This was back in the days before smart phones and (fortunately) the internet as we know it.
Videotaping was not allowed in the store, but since there was no way of it getting out for the world to see, I didn't stop him and just went along to see how it all played out.
The guy in the g-string strutted (like he had anything worth strutting) back to the pop section of the cooler. I kept a straight face. It just about killed me, but I managed to look bored.
He brought his pop to the counter and gave me a $10. I gave him his change. He held the coins in his hand but put the bills in the g-string, saying, "I like to keep my bills in here."
You know how you always think of something funny to say when it's too late? Yeah. I'd been keeping the perfect straight face, but the perfect comeback was out of my mouth before I could stop it.
As soon as he tucked the bills in the g-string, I said, "Good thing they're small bills."
His friend was doubled over laughing, unable to tape. The guy turned beet red and I had to crack a smile.
Wanting to let him off the hook, I said, "Is this for a bet or dare or something?"
He chuckled and went back to the same strutting-type personality he had before and said, "Why no. Why do you ask?"
They left laughing. I smiled and had fits of giggles for the rest of the night.